My best version of Sex

For me, it all starts with attraction! An attraction where the connection rises from the heart!


When I was younger, I used to be able to enjoy my sexual energy without the heart connection, but when I got older, this changed. I slowly began to get excited with a partner only when the heart was involved.
When the heart attraction is there, the next step would be to take our time and slowly build up the fire between us.


I also love feeling that my partner is turned on! When she really enjoys what is happening, whatever this is, I also enjoy with her!

I am very somatically oriented, so I love experiencing the touch and the vision. The combination of touching and looking at a woman’s body is a turn-on for many men!


Something else very important to have the best version of sex is to feel that I am relaxed and that my partner is relaxed, that there is no performance between us. When performance is not there, we can surrender at the moment, allowing the energy to rise on its own, dropping in the experience but checking in with each other.
In that state, most of the time, I’m able to feel what my partner is feeling and how her body responds at this particular moment and if a slight disconnection occurs, I withdraw back to myself and lose connection like a thread being broken!


The actual intercourse for me goes into waves of passion and excitement and cools down into very little movement and stillness, just being there in the moment with sensations and the feeling of the energies merging and coming together.
That is the moment that I get super high, and my energy moves up my spine, which can produce many different energetic orgasms connected to the energetic orgasms of my partner.
It is the moment that we are not any more two but one! Two bodies but one energy.


This is the total no-mind space, being fully present in the moment!


Giten Tonkov

For me, the best version of sex is a continuation of a flirting process during the whole day (if talking about a relationship). I love feeling that flirting process in the relationship air with a touch of seducing and hunting so that there is spiciness and attraction!
When the relationship is boring and has lost passion, the sex for me becomes boring and almost routine.

I always like a preliminary act, such as dancing, eye gazing, massaging, etc, that helps me relax and enter deep into my feminine polarity. When I enter my inner woman full-on, I can start relaxing, and from the relaxation, the excitement begins to rise.


After that moment, I need to feel safe with my partner and able to be authentic! When I was younger, I used to perform with different sounds and movements according to what I had seen in the movies. I was faking it until I could feel it because I was not connected to my body and to my partner. Now I need the opposite. I need to be free, safe and accepted by my partner no matter the space I enter.
If, for example, I have to hold my emotions or wildness to not scare my partner, then I do not enjoy sex.


Sex, for me, is a field of pleasure, depth, transformation and union. It is an amazing meditation of a journey into different worlds! For this to happen, we both need to be fully present in our bodies and in the moment, feeling the energy fully between us and, as Giten also mentioned being able to tap into the union and also into ourselves.
Sometimes this can be overwhelming, and I might try to avoid going deep, knowing that the depth will probably lead me to death. I am always grateful when my partner can then take me back into our “meditation,” showing me that he can hold space for me no matter what comes out.


In a few words, my best version of sex is when there is a combination of fire and water.
A combination of love, emotions, desire and fire built up in all our bodies: physical, emotional and energetic. In this state, sex becomes a dance with lots of energetic waves that can last a day or more and can nurture our beings!


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